Funny Sayings (916)

Don't Call Me I'm on Lake Time

never say the Q Word on my shift

Nurse Superpower 12 Hours No Bathroom Break

Yes I Have Eyes In The Back Of My Head and I saw that

Who Needs A Map I've been Down Every Back Road

I Don't Walk My Dog My Dog Walks Me

The Couch technically belongs to The Dog I just pay for it

Bought My Cat a fancy new bed She Picked The Box

My Cat Isn't Mean she's just Silently Judging You

undefeated Wishbone Champion defending my title every Thanksgiving

Sharing Is Caring except when it comes to Pumpkin Pie Get Your Own Slice

My Wife's Honey-Do List is longer than My Retirement Plan

Helmet Hair Don't Care the ride was Worth It

Just One More Cast said every fisherman Three Hours Ago

Never Schedule Me on a Full Moon Night Shift

Coffee First then I'll teach Your Little Angels

Teacher Life holding it Since 7:45 Until 3:15

I've Seen Sunrise In Ohio and Sunset In Texas same day, same coffee

My Dog gets the Zoomies At Midnight every single night

Dog Grandma I don't have grandkids I have Grandpups

My Cat Ignores Her Name but hears The Treat Bag From Three Rooms Away

Cat Dad never leaves home without his Lint Roller

twenty years at the Kids' Table Still Waiting for my promotion

Tree Up November 1st don't judge me I Need The Joy

I'm The Boss my wife said so She Also Said Take Out The Trash

Weather Forecast doesn't matter I Ride Rain Or Shine

My Tackle Box is worth more than My Truck And I'm Okay With That

Not A Morning Person unless The Fish Are Biting

My Nursing Shoes have walked More Miles Than My Car

Teacher Life I'll be finding Glitter Until July

Five-Star Dining means Truck Stop Coffee And Pie

Proud Trucker's Wife he drives the miles I Hold Down The Home Front

I Bought The Couch but The Dog Owns It

In Our House we have to spell W-A-L-K Or Else

If It's On The Table my cat will Push It Off The Edge

Bought My Cat A $50 Bed she chose The Box It Came In